I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
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