Texts From Last Night

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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.

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  (608): If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome. http://tfl.nu/khdb
  Replies (70) Good night (3826) Bad night (713)
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  (209): View more from California

  I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.

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  (209): I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope. http://tfl.nu/7xzu
  Replies (42) Good night (5949) Bad night (611)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.

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  (814): i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit. http://tfl.nu/riqs
  Replies (72) Good night (4573) Bad night (952)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face

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  (503): I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face http://tfl.nu/4e48
  Replies (38) Good night (4389) Bad night (1411)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  did u really fuck my little sister???

  (706): View more from Georgia

  im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"

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  (678): did u really fuck my little sister??? (706): im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess" http://tfl.nu/dz4c
  Replies (155) Good night (15788) Bad night (1896)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw

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  (630): Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw http://tfl.nu/yy7h
  Replies (21) Good night (1578) Bad night (3673)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.

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  (+44): The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself. http://tfl.nu/y3oz
  Replies (4) Good night (852) Bad night (2059)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.

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  (973): composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals. http://tfl.nu/kw2o
  Replies (13) Good night (5282) Bad night (911)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere

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  (989): there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere http://tfl.nu/hg2l
  Replies (12) Good night (1176) Bad night (2851)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to

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  (502): They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut. (808): oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to http://tfl.nu/7uxf
  Replies (7) Good night (3166) Bad night (694)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.

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  (613): You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again. http://tfl.nu/k6jo
  Replies (5) Good night (1658) Bad night (1186)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?

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  (403): I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain? http://tfl.nu/msrw
  Replies (3) Good night (1838) Bad night (525)
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  (661): View more from California

  Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo

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  (661): Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo http://tfl.nu/bjmc
  Replies (6) Good night (989) Bad night (413)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.

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  (616): Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah. http://tfl.nu/bo14
  Replies (6) Good night (776) Bad night (409)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!

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  (714): GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo! http://tfl.nu/3so0
  Replies (2) Good night (911) Bad night (186)

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