there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
