Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two words...techno handjob
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
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