But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
