She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
