Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
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And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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