You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
