doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
