Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
