Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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