Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
