Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
