Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
You may now shotgun with the bride
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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