Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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