see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
