I'm lost and stupid without you.
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
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she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
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How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.