omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize