i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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