in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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