yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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