i may or may not be watching the land before time
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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