don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
