I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
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