Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
