My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
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We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
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