Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
