I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.