i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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