At least make sure they are 18
Why
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
