So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
