Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize