imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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