they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Randomize
