It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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