So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize