i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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