Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
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After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
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Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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