I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
