Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again. http://tfl.nu/zwji
  Replies (5) Good night (2437) Bad night (692)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  She said she didn't have time to shave "there"

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): She said she didn't have time to shave "there" (617): Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster. http://tfl.nu/ama3
  Replies (58) Good night (915) Bad night (4716)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation http://tfl.nu/efec
  Replies (77) Good night (5311) Bad night (1417)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor http://tfl.nu/fgya
  Replies (16) Good night (711) Bad night (3485)
• Favorite

  (418): View more from Quebec

  You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (418): You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry" http://tfl.nu/nwle
  Replies (11) Good night (7003) Bad night (1158)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (865): She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit". http://tfl.nu/1ezf
  Replies (23) Good night (8312) Bad night (1018)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her. http://tfl.nu/v3pj
  Replies (6) Good night (3145) Bad night (660)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper. http://tfl.nu/svv9
  Replies (12) Good night (1366) Bad night (2686)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in. http://tfl.nu/gea0
  Replies (4) Good night (746) Bad night (1502)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video http://tfl.nu/4318
  Replies (10) Good night (2715) Bad night (749)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I think I just cured my dogs munchies

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): I think I just cured my dogs munchies http://tfl.nu/38nb
  Replies (1) Good night (460) Bad night (323)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative. http://tfl.nu/cyri
  Replies (1) Good night (451) Bad night (314)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night. http://tfl.nu/g1sg
  Replies (2) Good night (467) Bad night (312)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection? http://tfl.nu/93gn
  Replies (5) Good night (426) Bad night (566)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (856): Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit http://tfl.nu/iumy
  Replies (0) Good night (612) Bad night (274)

Randomize