i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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