They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Randomize
