The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize