Can Purell be used as lube?
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
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