I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize