Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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