she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
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