This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
