TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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