i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize