Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
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If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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