Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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