I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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