you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize